Feb. 23rd, 2012

den_is_azysapphy: (deathfromabove)
Alright, since I apparently can't speak my mind over on Facebook without getting reminded that I am living with my parents rent-free... And because I at least feel like I can speak my mind here without fear of retribution... And I'm not going to put this under a cut.

To some of the people on my FB Friends list:

I'm getting fucking sick and tired of being treated like I'm being a fucking spoiled brat when I try and get my feelings about things off of my chest. I FUCKING KNOW how lucky I am. QUIT FUCKING REMINDING ME. Yeah, I might have more luxuries than y'all did when you were my age, but y'all don't have nearly the amount of stupid problems I have. Y'all don't have a stupid fear of speaking your minds at the perceived risk of losing dear friends for doing so. Y'all don't make one another feel stupid for things that get written.

Most of the time, you don't do that to me. But there are times that it happens, whether you mean it to or not. That shit hurts. I have to deal with it at home, because my parents seem convinced that I'm not even worth the effort of being courteous towards. And forget praising me. The last time I heard praise for doing something worthwhile, it was while I was working at West. Back in 2009. Yeah, I get thanked for making cookies when the mood strikes me to do so, and I get the occasional thanks for other things, but outright praise? Nope.

What sucks is that I don't even feel like I can say any of this on Facebook, because I know I'll just get told to "Suck it up." Well, guess what? There's only so fucking many times that I can "suck it up". I don't need someone older and tougher than me telling me that. I need someone to fucking LISTEN to what I'm not saying. I need someone to tell me that things will be okay, and that if I need a hug, they'll be there, even if it's just in spirit. I need someone who understands just why I am upset at being talked down to on a fucking daily basis.

Yes, I am a needy bitch. But really, the fact that I need to be treated like I matter to someone, somewhere.... It seems like such a small fucking price for all the times I've been more than willing to lend a shoulder to cry on, or a sympathetic ear, or even someone to rant at. If my needing true friends, and being allowed to rant and rave till I get my upset feelings out and dealt with in a constructive and healthy way makes me a fucking horrible person, so fucking be it.

If you don't want to be a part of the ride, then push the fucking unsubscribe button and be free. I won't be too upset. Yeah, it'll suck that we're not talking, but really, if you can't even see past the ranting and raving to the friend I can be, then I don't want anything to do with you either.


den_is_azysapphy: (Default)

November 2012

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